Tuesday, February 5, 2013

The Voice Above the Clouds

the famous rolling ridge of Mt. Batulao
Some phrases may not be deemed appropriate for readers below 18 years of age, parental guidance is advised.


I have been travelling almost all my life. If I am not taking the rough dusty road of an unknown place somewhere, I am either lurking by the sea shore or sleeping under the blanket of stars. All of my travels and adventure escapes are fun, exciting, and worth remembering... except for the one that happened 2 years ago.

“Jim Bryan Ilardeeeee! Have some balls!” the lady was screaming her lungs out at the summit of Mt. Batulao. You can hear her voice falters as she speaks in between hiccup of tears. You know she’s in pain and you will know she’s heartbroken. The wind brings the trail of her voice far and wide but I doubt if that certain Jim Bryan Ilarde heard what she’s shouting up there.

That climb was planned months before; they planned it together. But a week before the climb, she sensed that there’s something wrong. The sweetness in the relationship turned bitter all of a sudden. Theirs was a short-lived romance, 6 months to be exact. She does not want to end it yet, but he wanted to. On that climb he did not show up; he said he will, but he did not. She called  his phone that morning and he said he will just day hike Mt. Marami and go to Batulao right after. But no Jim Bryan showed up. She knows he’s with that girl he met 3 weeks before. That girl he was with in that ugly photo. That girl is the reason of his coldness... that starfish girl.

There is something more painful than not seeing him in that climb and that is expecting that his shadow will still show up on the trail.  There is something most painful than a broken heart, and that is the denial of its existence. They did not bid goodbyes. They did not called it off.  They never talked about parting ways. But everything has changed, and all changes happened all so sudden that it was difficult for her to cope up. She was trying really hard to deny the obvious fact that he is already seeing someone else. She hoped that he had the balls to tell her that whatever they had is over. But no, she was left hanging by the cliff. She ended hoping for a hopeless case of kiss and makeup then going back to each other’s arm. Because it will not happen. At least not on that day.

So there, at the top of the Mt. Batulao someone is trying to put together the pieces of her shattered heart and broken ego. By shouting “Jim Bryan Ilardeeeeeee! Have some balls! Why don’t you fucking tell me that you are seeing someone eeeelse!?” She was shouting something more but these lines she kept on repeating.

When she ran out of breath and her voice box gave up, she sat there. Staring at the nothingness, she somewhat felt okay; not completely okay but definitely better than what she felt when she started climbing and shouting and waiting for Jim Bryan to come. She looked down to the community below, then she realized that there are gazillion more people who are going through more painful challenges than what she’s facing that time. There are other more people who can climb with her, dive with her, travel with her, and escape the world with her. She should not waste another tear for that guy. He is just one amidst the million of options. 

Then she turned her gaze up above the azure sky. The clear bright sky above shows that even clouds are just passing by. Like them, she should move on too. She cannot stay at the summit forever, she should brave the rocky and slippery trail and go down. She will slip and fall but eventually she will reach home.

The author has a consent to use the name Jim Bryan Ilarde; her boyfriend and sole mate. How they ended up together is another story. :D


This is my entry to the Pinoy Travel Bloggers’ Blog Carnival for the month of February with the theme
“Where do broken hearts go?” It is hosted by Rain Amantiad-Campanilla of RakistangNars.

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  1. I've climbed Batulao, albeit with a happy heart. Mountain climbing is indeed therapeutic for heartbreak. I climbed my first mountain after a major one. Will mention that for my blog carnival entry too. =)

    P.S. I hope to hear about the back story of this entry another time - perhaps during our meet-up. =)

  2. Now I want to know how you guys ended up together hehe

  3. The story will unfold when our paths meet. Hopefully soon! Over a bottle of beer perhaps? ;)

  4. Yeah, maybe I'll go with Claire during your meet-up. :)


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